Bugs

I felt something crawling around my helmet when I was riding my bike. Then a hornet came across the inside of my visor. I lifted my visor to blow it out, but it just blew back by my ear. I pulled over, got my helmet off, and somehow didn't get stung. What really pissed me off is that I wasted the "F" word on an insect. I need to save those for golf and Kobe Bryant.

Calvin

I love this picture! It looks like Calvin thinks he can walk on air. He's fearless.

Yellowstone

This is the biggest deer I've ever seen!


The Firehole River. Warm and gorgeous.


Here are my clothes after I skinny dipped in the Firehole.


And of course, Old Faithful.


Wow!

Nikki's new house

Nikki's new house is awesome! It's really quiet and has a great yard. The girls really like it.


It's easy being the favorite uncle!

Timpanogos

I hiked Timpanogos this week. It was really gorgeous!

Water skiing

Chris, Lukas and I went water skiing tonight. I haven't skiing since my shoulder surgery so I was really rusty.

The water in Benson is filthy, but it sure is gorgeous!


This was Lukas's first time skiing so Chris was helping him out.


Chris calls this the "Scout Master". You know what, I don't judge.

Charlotte

I watched Charlotte and Calvin tonight. Charlotte was really cute! She's so mellow and easy to watch.

Fireworks!

We stopped to buy fireworks at an Indian reservation in Idaho. This sign was a fantastic piece of marketing. The Indian fireworks stand was named "Pow Wow". Brilliant!

Golf tourney

Shaun, Robbie, Mark and I won our golf tourney last Saturday. Chris and his buddies got second. Dan and Jeremy's team was third. I should have taken more pictures, but this is all I have.

Our next tourney should be in two weeks.

Phone

S.O.S. - Chris dropped his phone in the water skiing tonight. Let me know if anyone has a spare one. He's with Sprint.

4th of July Outfit

I'm golfing with my dad in a golf tourney on the 4th. I thought I'd pick out a special outfit for him. He'll be so proud.

Babysitting

Calvin and I painted a table and chairs while I was babysitting him. Now I have little footprints and dog prints in my garage.

Why I love bikes

Here's the flier I made for our golf tourney

Nikki's Basement

I'm going to help Nikki and Ian finish their basement. Wednesday I'm going to SLC to get started. My carpetry skills are probably a bit rusty so I thought I'd put some pictures up of Nikki's kids while they're still happy with me.

Bike tire

I needed a new rear tire for my bike. When my new one came I decided to use up the rest of my old one.

Star Trek

William Shatner was on the Dan Patrick radio show this morning. I guess there was some tension between Leonard Nemoy and Shatner. Dan Patrick said that when Shatner got women on the set of Star Trek they called it "Spock-blocking".

He also called the Vulcan grip the Ruffie of the 60s.

Irony

This video is real. He shoots himself in the foot while demonstrating gun safety. Tard.

Great videos

For anyone that's watched the "I'm f***ing Matt Damon" video, here you go.

New words

Some people were offended by my new word "vagenda". Thanks for all the guesses, but a "vagenda" is what I call the to-do list my buddy's wife gives him every weekend.

In order not to offend anymore, I'm not going to share any more of my new words like "funt" and "ambidicktrous".

Poor Jer Bear

Jeremy just stopped by my office, and told me something fantastic! Last night Jer bought "Grand Theft Auto 4" at Best Buy, and the checkout girl carded him. LOL, so sad.

Reasons I suspect I’m getting older

• Women under 21 seem a bit young to me.
• When I hear a noise outside late at night I investigate in my pajamas and slippers.
• I don’t skip through Viagra commercials.
• I like being regular.
• I signal when I change lanes.
• I recycle.
• I floss.
• I’m becoming racist.
• I have a will.
• I sometimes plan out my weekends.
• I wish I knew how to play dominoes.
• I used the work “quaint” yesterday.

Top of the Alps

I imagine this is what marriage is like.

Polygamy Rocks!

Comedy Central

This is pretty good.

The Mormon President's Murder

My Bitches

Sadie and M chase each other constantly when they're outside. It's hilarious to watch!
Here are their play buddies who come over daily. They just chase each other around the yard and do a lot of sniffing. It's like watching Chris date.

What a business!

I took a picture of this SUV in California a couple weeks ago. Just in case you can't see this here's what it reads:

• Private Autopsies
• Forensic Autopsies
• DNA (Paternity) Analysis
• Prod. (T.V., Movie) Consultant

And you can reach them at 1-800-AUTOPSY. And just in case you missed it, those are balls hanging on the towing hitch. Classy.

Calvin

Yesterday I was hanging out with Calvin. When we were in my car I asked him if he knew what the ashtray was for. He said, "it's where you put your smokes". LOL!

Monkey suit

Here's a random picture of Calvin I just found. He's playing with Sadie while dressed up in his monkey suit.

Spring Break

Summer begins. Don't bother calling me next week.

Ice Fishing

My Lap Dogs

Yes, I have two lap dogs. I wish I could defend myself on this, but I won't even try. Here are Sadie and M before their haircuts.



After the haircuts.



Here's M after she ate Mia's play lipstick.

USU's Smoking Ban

Here's Chris's latest report from Aggie TV. Hillarious! I love how Chris make Kevin Abernathy look like an idiot. He is.

Come on spring!

Check out how much snow we have at my house!

My road is pretty buried too.

Shed

I put my shed on the end of "Barnett Lane". It's actually much bigger than I expected.

You can see the pile of material left over from Michelle's shed. I built the base of the shed in my driveway and then we moved it into place. I'm sure the neighbors loved the pile of garbage.

Rob pretending to work. We all know his gig, he's just a poser.

I wish I had a better picture of the shed. I haven't finished putting the sided on, but it turned out awesome. Four motorcycles fit inside, and I built a loft inside. It has stairs going up to it, and it's carpeted all over. Calvin calls it the "igloo" because it's blue, even though it's warm inside.

Tearing down a shed

One of my co-workers told me I could tear down their shed. I got the bright idea of using the material to building a shed for my motorcycles and other stuff.

Here's what it looked like before.

Shaun, Rob, and Chris helped one afternoon. Actually, I really didn't give them much choice.


Here's what it looked like after I took off the second story. This was a lot more work than I anticipated! I still have to move about 1/3 of this stuff from Michelle's yard. Sorry! At least your kids have something to play on.

TV reporter

This is Chris's first story for the University TV station. After you watch this video, check out his biography on the USU website. You'll have to scroll down until you get to "Chris Garff".

Tuesday I'm posting an announcement on my blog. It's big, and should be very, very entertaining!


http://www.usu.edu/atvnews/crew.cfm

Snake River

I camped below Palisades Dam. I love the Snake River!
It was pretty high, and the fishing wasn't very good.

Brent, Brad and I floated past these waterfalls a couple years ago in our little pontoon boats. This was the trip Brad didn't bring a sleeping bag, pants, jacket, or underwear. He also made me stop the car so he could chase cows. Brad had Brent and me laughing the entire trip. The girl we were with wasn't as amused. Perfect.

This sign should read "The only hot cocoa in town". And who says "cocoa"? Wait I bet that's what LB's mom calls it when she makes it for him in the winter.

Inappropriate

If Greg was Dutch this is what he'd be like.

Horses

Sadie's infatuated with the horses next door. She barks at them and they just look at her. It's ridiculous.