Reasons I suspect I’m getting older

• Women under 21 seem a bit young to me.
• When I hear a noise outside late at night I investigate in my pajamas and slippers.
• I don’t skip through Viagra commercials.
• I like being regular.
• I signal when I change lanes.
• I recycle.
• I floss.
• I’m becoming racist.
• I have a will.
• I sometimes plan out my weekends.
• I wish I knew how to play dominoes.
• I used the work “quaint” yesterday.